Za Vjeru i vjerovanje moji roditelji su često, ako ne i prečesto pričali u našoj obitelji i govorili da Boga nema, trebalo bi Ga izmisliti

 

Robin’s question on November 5th 2024 = Nevjeste Robin Pitanje 5 studenog 2024

My answer to my daughter-in-law  Robin. Robin is the wife of my son Stjepan Boban. I am her father-in-law Mile Boban. Her question to me is:

“What are some of your favorite family traditions?”

The traditions of the family of Petra and Iva Boban were created according to family needs. They had fifteen (15) children. They got married in 1933. They had their first child, a daughter, Jaka, in 1934, and their last child, a son, Ante, in 1960.      

During that time and until my parents’ death, the “Peter and Iva Boban Family Tradition” was created. I left the tradition of my parents’ family nest on Friday, August 15, 1957. For this, I will answer to my daughter-in-law  Robin here only with my memories that I experienced and lived through as a child and as a boy with my parents. As an example, I will take a day during which decisions were made about my parents’ family tradition. Decisions on this day can refer to one day, one week, one month, or the entire year; it will be the same.
I will start in the morning. My mother was always the first to get up. Back then, we didn’t have running water in the house, we didn’t have electricity  nor today’s technology. We had a cistern in the house and we didn’t have to go to the community well of Bobanova Draga like the other over 90% of the residents of Bobanova Draga had to . Mother would prepare something to eat for us children as a kind of breakfast and would prepare us for school or for household chores. Father would get up and enter the kitchen. He would greet us all with our morning Croatian Catholic and Christian greeting with Faljen Isus i Marija (Be Blessed by Jesus and Mary). Then our father would tell us all what we would do that day. Those were our everyday family traditions. And so we would leave the house, each with our daily task and our designated path.
My dear daughter in law Robin, I honestly think that in one way or another we were all raised  for the best and most beautiful life traditions. So when we are all together in the evening, sitting around the stove, my mother cooks dinner and listens to our conversation, into which she also joins in when necessary, and we all talk about what we did that day, what we heard from others, what we saw and what we experienced. This gives our parents the idea to also tell their memories and their experiences that they went through in their lives. Through these stories, we, as their children, learned about many of their traditions from the past. That’s how it used to be and that’s how traditions have been passed down from generation to generation until today. From all the traditions from the past, each of us chose one or some that we loved more than the others.
So I, my dear daughter in law Robin, chose one of all the traditions that was the most beloved to me, and that is: Family love, family loyalty, family joy, family satisfaction, family trust, family patience, family tolerance, and most importantly, FAITH! Because without FAITH there is no life, no progress, no inspiration to move forward and for any desired life achievement. As I write this today, Tuesday, November 5, 2024, I quickly think of the various American historical events described by ABC Anchor Peter Jennings in 2000 on DVD and VCR from 1900 to 2000. Each DVD and VCR has ten years of descriptions of American history and family traditions. The DVD and VCR start from 1900-1910, 1910-1920, etc. up to the year 2000. Looking at these DVD and VCR descriptions and pictures, I am convinced that each reader would find for themselves some picture or some descriptions that would be their favorite.
My favorite family traditions are expressed in many ways and categories and these were all those that still remain in my memories. As an example, I heard from my parents that
– Human life is like a cloak: when it gets dirty, it is cleaned, when it gets torn, it is patched, but it is worn as long as you are alive.
– A man is never as beautiful as when he asks for forgiveness, or when he forgives others.
– A woman, if she is honest, good, educated, gentle and witty, in my opinion she is the most wonderful creature in the world. If a woman is good, then she is placed between a man and an angel, if she is evil, then a woman is between a man and a devil.
– For our upbringing, my parents would tell us that human life should never be portrayed as either too difficult or too easy, but should be portrayed as living and natural needs.
– Idealism for me, my parents often said, is a passion for everything that is done perfectly and the like. They told me that because in my youth I was very lively, i.e. fiery and defiant.
– For Faith and Belief my parents often, if not too often, talked in our family and said that if there is no God, then He should be invented; because a man without faith would not be wise, and a man with faith would be wise, would have the strength that would make him strong, free, spirited, full of visions that would give him wings to fly wherever he wants.

My dear daughter-in-law Robin, I tried to answer your question as best I could:

“What are some of your favorite family traditions?”

All I have listed here are my family experiences while I lived with my parents, what I heard from them, what I personally went through and what I remembered from my parents and what I heard from others. Daughter-in-law Robin, your question made me feel younger because it gave me the opportunity to recall almost everything I heard, what I experienced and what I went through in my young life through this answer. These are memories that are not forgotten, and will not be forgotten. They will not be forgotten for good, my dear daughter-in-law Robin, because you asked me that question through which I described all of it and everything written will remain recorded as a History. The Croatian proverb says: HISTORY IS THE TEACHER OF LIFE.
Thank you very much, my daughter-in-law Robin.
Austin, Texas
Tuesday November 5th ,2024

Mile Boban

Moj odgovor nevjesti Robin. Robin je supruga mog sina Stjepana Boban. Ja sam njen svekar Mile Boban. Njezino pitanje meni je:

“Koje su od vaših omiljenih obiteljskih tradicija?”

Tradicije obitelji Petra i Ive Boban su se stvarale po obiteljskoj potrebi. Oni su imali petnaestero (15) djece. Oženili su se 1933 godine. Prvo dijete su imali, kćer Jaka 1934., a zadnje dijete sina Ante 1960. Kroz to vrijeme i sve do smrti mojih roditelja se je stvarala “Obiteljska Tradicija Petra i Ive Boban”. Ja sam napustio tradiciju obiteljskog gnijezda mojih roditelja u petak 15. kolovoza 1957. Za to ću nevjesti Robin odgovoriti ovdje samo moja sjećanja koja sam kao dijete i kao dječak doživio i proživio sa mojim roditeljima. Kao primjer ja ću uzeti jedan dan kroz koji su se donosile odluke obiteljske tradicije mojih roditelja. Odluke ovog dana se mogu odnositi na jedan dan, na jedan tjedan, na jedan mjesec ili na cijelu godinu; to će biti svejedno.
Ja ću početi od jutra. Moja majka je uvijek bila prva koja se je ustajala. Mi tada nismo imali tekuće vode u kući, nismo imali struje niti današnje tehnike. Imali smo čatrnju u kući i nismo trebali ići na bunar zajednice Bobanove Drage kao što su morali ići drugi preko 90% žitelji Bobanove Drage. Majka bi za nas djecu pripremila nešto pojesti kao jedna vrst doručaka i pripremala bi nas u školu ili za poslove kućne potrebe. Otac bi se digao i ulazeći u kuhinju on bi nas sve pozdravio sa našim jutarnjim hrvatskim katoličkim i kršćanskim pozdravom sa Faljen Isus i Marija (Be Blessed by Jesus and Mary). Tada bi naš otac svima nama šta ćemo taj dan raditi. To su bile svakodnevne naše obiteljske tradicije. I tako bi mi odlazili iz kuće, svaki sa svojom dnevnom zadaćom i svojim određenim putem.
Draga moja nevjesta Robin ja iskreno mislim da smo mi svi na jedan ili drugi način odgojeni u pohlepi za što boljim i ljepšim životnim tradicijama. Tako kada smo mi uvečer svi skupa zajedno, sjedimo oko šporeta, mater kuha večeru u sluša naš razgovor u koji se i ona po potrebi ubaci, te svi pričamo o onome što smo taj dan radili, što smo od drugih čuli, što smo vidjeli i što smo doživjeli. To daje našim roditeljima ideju da i oni kažu svoje uspomene i svoje doživljaje kroz koje su prošli kroz njihov život. Kroz te njihove priče mi kao njihova djeca smo saznali za mnoge njihove tradicije iz prošlosti. Tako je to prije bilo i tako su se tradicije prenosile iz koljena u koljeno sve do današnjih dana. Iz svih tradicija iz prošlosti, svaki od nas je izabrao neku ili neke koju je volio više od drugih.
Tako sam i ja, draga moja nevjesta Robin izabrao jedno od svih tradicija koja je za mene bila najomiljenija, a ta je: Obiteljska ljubav, obiteljska odanost, obiteljsko veselje, obiteljsko zadovoljstvo, obiteljsko povjerenje, obiteljsko strpljenje, obiteljska snošljivost, i što je najvažnije jest VJERA! Jer bez VJERE nema života, nema napretka, nema nadahnuća za ići dalje i za bilo koje životno željno postignuće. Dok ja ovo danas pišem, utorak 5 studenoga 2024. na brzinu mi pade na pamet američke razne povijesne dogodovštine koje je opisao ABC Anchor Peter Jennings 2000 u DVD i VCR od 1900 do 2000 godine. Svaki DVD i VCR ima deset godina opisa američke povijesti i životnih obiteljskih tradicija. DVD i VCR počimaju od godine 1900-1910., 1910.-1920. itd a sve do godine 2000. Gledajući te DVD i VCR opise i slike, uvjerenja sam da bi svaki čitatelj za sebe pronašao neku sliku ili neke opise koji bi za njih bili omiljeni.
Moje omiljene obiteljske tradicije su izražene u više načina i kategorija a to su bili sve one koje su mi još uvijek ostale u mojim sjećanjima. Kao primjer čuo sam od mojih roditelja da je
– Čovječji život kao haljina: kad se uprlja očisti se, kad se podere, zakrpa se, ali se nosi dok si živ.
– čovjek nije nikad tako lijep kao onda kad za oproštenje moli, ili kad drugima oprašta.
– Žena ako je poštena, dobra, obrazovana, nježna i duhovita, po mome sudu ona je najdivniji stvor na svijetu. Ako je žena dobra onda je ona stavljena između čovjeka i anđela, ako je zla onda je žena između čovjeka i vraga.
– Za odgoj moji roditelji bi nama znali reći da ljudski život nikad ne valja prikazivati ni preteškim  ni odveć lagodnim, već ga treba prikazivati životnim i prirodnim potrebama.
– Idealizam za mene su moji roditelji ćesto puta znali reći da je to zanos za sve što je savršeno urađeno i tome slično. To su oni meni govorili jer sam ja u mojim mladenačkim danima bio vrlo živahan, tj. vatren i prkosan.
– Za Vjeru i vjerovanje moji roditelji su često, ako ne i prečesto pričali u našoj obitelji i govorili da Boga nema, trebalo bi Ga izmisliti; jer čovjek bez vjere ne bi bio mudar, a čovjek s vjerom bi bio mudar, imao bi snagu koja bi ga činila snažnim, slobodnim, duhovnim, pun vizija koja će mu dati krila da može letjeti svugdje gdje želi.

Draga moja nevjesta Robin ja sam nastojao što sam god mogao bolje odgovoriti na tvoje pitanje:

“Koje su vaše neke omiljene obiteljske tradicije?”

Sve što sam tu naveo su moji obiteljski doživljaji dok sam ja živio sa mojim roditeljima, što sam od njih čuo, kroz što sam osobno prošao i što sam zapamtio od mojih roditelja i što sam od drugih čuo. Robin tvoje pitanje me je pomladilo jer mi je dalo priliku da kroz ovaj odgovor se prisjetim skoro svega što sam čuo, što sam proživio i kroz što sam prošao u mojem mladenačkom životu. To su uspomene koje se ne zaboravljaju, i neće biti zaboravljene. Ne će biti zaboravljene rado toga, draga moja nevjesta Robin, jer si mi ti postavila to pitanje preko kojeg sam ja sve to opisao i sve napisano će ostati zapisana povijest. Hrvatska poslovica kaže: POVIJEST JE UČITELJICA ŽIVOTA.
Velika ti hvala nevjesta Robin.
Austin, Texas
Utorak, 5. studenoga 2024.

Mile Boban